Wondering what to do when he says he needs space? Have you ever been seemingly really happy and content in a relationship that you thought was unshakeable, only to be greeted by your partner telling you that he ‘needs more space’? On its own, this can be a really scary thing to hear, does it mean that he wants to leave you? Are you doing something to drive him away? Does he just not like you anymore? It could be one of these things, but it could be none of these things, the prospect of ‘needing space’ can cover a multitude of issues, and they don’t always have to lead to the break up of the relationship. Here are a few tips for what to do when he says he needs space.
1. Don’t Call and Text Constantly
This is one of the biggest answers for what to do when he says he needs space. When he says he wants space, he means it, even if you don’t understand. Try not to call and message constantly, because he will just see that as a lack of respect for his choices. Sending a simple goodnight text to let him know that you are thinking of him and are there for him when he needs you will make him feel great, but twelve missed calls in the morning is a surefire way to drive him further away. Also, keeping quiet will give him time to start missing you!
2. Don’t Make Assumptions
Just because he is craving some ‘me time’, it doesn’t always mean that he wants to leave you. We all get in our own heads sometimes; it could be to do with work stress, or a family situation, or simply a low period personally in which you don’t feel like having people around you. Don’t be ignorant enough to think that he is trying to break contact with you; he might instead be trying to reconnect with himself in order to become a better partner on the other side of the tunnel.
3. Don’t Stalk Online
When he has asked for this space, don’t invade it in a cyber sense by stalking his social media platforms during your time apart. When you aren’t entirely sure about why he has asked for this space, any little update or photo can send you into a tailspin filled with false information and conspiracy theories. Trust me when I say that having fake news rolling around in your head is much worse than having no news at all!
4. Don’t Panic
It can be hard, but seriously, try not to panic! Guys are very bad at sharing their feelings and articulating their emotions, so whilst you might go to your best gal pals for a unwind period, he might see cutting off contact for a while as his only option because he doesn’t want to share his weaknesses with you. If he wants a little space, give it to him, it might be his only way of working his issues out.
5. Do the Same
Take this time as a chance to have a little ‘me time’ for yourself as well. Whilst he is away doing a little self-reflection, you do the same, and you might come back together with a fresh perspective and renewed enthusiasm for your relationship.