All Women's Talk

Don't Let These 7 Things Distract You from Finding Love ...

By Alison

Finding love isn't an exact science, but we often go about it the wrong way. We may sabotage our own efforts by not believing in ourselves, or thinking that we're not going to find someone who will truly love us. And if you don't believe it, then it's not going to happen. So don't let these 7 things distract you from finding love …

1 Thinking You Don't Deserve Love

Too many people don't find love because deep down they think they don't deserve it. And if you don't feel that you're worth it, you're not going to give off a very positive vibe. Instead, you should work on your self-esteem so that you come across as someone who's worth getting interested in. Of course you deserve to be loved!

2 Thinking You're Not Attractive Enough

Another way we self-sabotage our efforts to find love is thinking that we're not attractive enough. We often compare ourselves to other women unfavorably and think that next to them we're going to lose out because guys will be more interested in them. But a decent guy won't judge us just on looks - and anyway a guy who loves us will think we're the most beautiful woman in the world.


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3 Pursuing the Wrong Kind of Guys

Looking in the wrong place or pursuing the wrong kind of guys will also distract you from finding the relationship you deserve. If what you want is a steady relationship then you're wasting your time looking where people just want a casual hook-up. Stop wasting time in the wrong place and on the wrong guys, and focus your attention on finding a guy who will give you what you need.

4 Believing You Need Someone to Make You Complete

Another mistake is to think that you're not complete without a partner. You have more to offer a partner if you are happy already. So work on being a whole, happy person before you try finding love; let a relationship be the icing on the cake and not the whole cake!

5 Worrying You're Not the Right Weight

If you think you need to lose weight to find love, you need to love yourself first. By all means lose weight if you need to do so for your health, but don't do it because you think carrying some extra pounds won't be attractive to guys. I promise you, there are plenty of guys who are attracted to curvy girls - and someone who loves you won't make that love conditional on you being the 'perfect' weight.

6 Thinking Now is Not the Right Time

Do you always find reasons to put off the search for love? You'll wait until tomorrow to chat to that cute guy … or maybe next week … or never. Carpe Diem - wait too long and you might miss out. Take the initiative and don't let your nerves get in the way - or some other, more courageous girl might grab him!

7 Looking for the Perfect Guy

Believing that you should wait for the perfect guy or your soulmate will really hold you back. You'll forever be judging men by unrealistic standards and expecting them to live up to an ideal that doesn't exist. At worst, you could end up alone because you haven't met Mr Perfect. You know, you could be pretty happy with Mr Pretty Darn Good!

What else do you do that stops you finding love?

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