Have you ever wondered if there are specific things women do that push men away? Sometimes it seems like men and women are completely different when it comes to communication. What one woman deems to be appropriate dating behavior, a man might interpret to be total deal breaker. But don’t you worry, there are indeed winners in this game called love. While I can’t decode all men, what I can do is share some of the most common things women do that push men away. I think you might be surprised at some of them!
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1. Overanalyzing
One of the top things women do that push men away would be overanalyzing emotions. A man can say or do something without much thought, whereas a woman will spend hours discussing the nuances in said statement or act with a girlfriend. As a woman I know it’s hard not to overthink things when you’re dating someone new since you don’t always know where a guy stands, and let’s face it, not all guys are very transparent. However, too much analyzing can drive a man away as it can appear obsessive. If he didn’t text you as often as he did yesterday, just go with it. Don’t assume it means anything since it most likely doesn’t! If you’re always obsessing over small details and confronting him about them, things are sure to get uncomfortable quickly, which will make him, if not both of you, want to run!
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Overanalyzing can stem from a woman's desire for security and reassurance in a relationship. However, constantly questioning a man's every move or word can create tension and make him feel suffocated. This can also lead to arguments and misunderstandings, causing the relationship to suffer. Men value women who are confident and independent, and overanalyzing can come across as needy and insecure. It's important to trust and communicate openly with your partner instead of constantly analyzing their actions. This will help maintain a healthy and balanced relationship.
2. Drama Queen
I think we all know our share of drama queens and drama kings. While they might be entertaining to observe in action every now and then, it’s a totally different story if you’re dating that person. I don’t know about you, but I know plenty of women who love to start drama with their guy whenever and wherever. This means having no qualms about showing up at his workplace unannounced and causing a scene or having a very public meltdown. If the two of you have issues that need to be worked out, work it out behind-the-scenes. There’s no need to jeopardize someone’s job or safety in order to get your point across.
Frequently asked questions
Oh, it's tricky sometimes! Men might step back because they feel overwhelmed or maybe they're not ready for the relationship pace. It's not always something you did wrong; it could just be timing or personal stuff they're dealing with.
You know, stuff like being too clingy or expecting them to read your mind. Men appreciate space and honesty, so sometimes excessive jealousy or pressure can make them retreat.
Absolutely. Sometimes good intentions, like caring too much too soon or wanting to go at a different speed, can inadvertently push a good guy away. Finding that balance is key!
It could be fear of commitment or just feeling pressured when things get serious too quickly. Sometimes guys need a little time to process their feelings and make sure it's what they want.
Interesting question! Sometimes, yes. Extreme independence might make a guy feel like he's not needed, but it's really about finding that sweet spot where independence and togetherness can coexist.
3. Negative Nancy
Another one of the things that drive a man away is to be constantly negative about your relationship. This isn’t referring to genuine concerns about your relationship. It’s referring to constant negative questions and statements regarding your relationship, such as “Why don’t you love me anymore?” or “I know you don’t want to be with me anymore.” These types of statements are assuming the worst without any sort of evidence. If you have reason to believe that he’s no longer happy, be upfront instead peppering all of your conversations with accusatory statements. This way, you’re more likely to get a straight answer.
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Being labeled a Negative Nancy can cultivate a toxic environment, nudging him towards the exit. It’s vital to understand the difference between expressing legitimate concerns and perpetuating a cycle of negativity that can sap the joy out of your relationship. While it’s necessary to communicate issues, fixating on negative presumptions not only fosters distrust but also undervalues the positive aspects of your partnership. Aim for constructive conversations that reinforce your bond. Remember, balance is key—acknowledging the good along with the bad can help maintain a healthy, happy relationship dynamic.
4. Trying to Change Him
Trying to change someone is not the basis for a long-lasting, healthy partnership. Although you can help bring out the best in someone, trying to change a person to become the person you want is a sure way to push him away from you. Again, there’s nothing wrong with helping and encouraging someone to aim higher, but nagging and criticizing someone for not living up to your expectations is sure to drive a man away!
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Acceptance is key in any relationship. It's important to recognize and cherish your partner for who he is, rather than who you want him to be. Constructive support is beneficial, but when it crosses the line into attempting to mold him into an idealized version, resentment can fester. Remember, a relationship is about growing together, not forcing change to fit personal ideals. Embrace the differences, for they are what make your partnership unique and strengthen the bond between you.
5. Too Much, Too Soon
Getting too clingy or emotional too soon is another one of the things women do to push men away. Sure, you’re excited about your guy and your future together, but that doesn’t mean telling him you can’t live without him on your third date! Any statements referring to undying love and life-long commitments should be saved for when the relationship has matured to that level and the feelings are mutual. As excited as you might be, strong statements such as these can easily be misconstrued like you are very clingy and needy.
6. Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
If a woman goes around looking for problems, she’ll likely find them. What I mean by this is that if you look for problems with him or the relationship because you’re afraid of rejection and prematurely decide that it’s not going to work out, you’ll probably get what you want. If you start going through his emails, texts and social media activity looking for signs that he’s cheating or hiding something, you’re bound to find things you won’t like. This doesn’t mean he’s doing anything wrong, but if you see him conversing with an unknown female online and even if the conversation is totally innocent, you’re already assuming the worst so it can come across as something dishonest.
7. Living in the past
Lastly, things that drive men away don’t always have to be about him. If you frequently bring up your exes or aspects of your past relationships, it could easily drive a man away. Sometimes exes or past relationships come up unintentionally, but make sure you’re not sharing intimate details. I don’t know any woman who would be happy hearing about her partner’s exes or about in-depth facts about past relationships, do you? Doing so can come across like you’re living in the past and not genuinely ready or interested in moving on.
So ladies, what do you think of these things that drive a man away? Being in a relationship can be very hard and of course men are guilty of committing the same relationship crimes as women. Even if no one is perfect, we can all work to help make our relationships as healthy as possible. Do you have anything to add to this list?
Comments
Claudia: So true
Haley: Hello ladies, I need a bit of help. I am in an online relationship and we have been together for about 4 months. Everything has been going VERY well! We\'ve not met in person yet. When get doesn\'t call or text back, I feel really lonely And get upset. How can I cope with missing him so quickly and easily?
Nicky: Awesome article and very relatable
Maddie: If he doesn't like you for you then he can fuck off.
Imaprincess: So true
Gemma: Agree
Lex: GREAT READ!!!!!
chelsea: Love this
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