Getting over a crush who’s taken is never easy. Unfortunately, though, at some point in our lives we’ll all be in that situation. Whether you have been in the past, or are going through it right now, we’ve all been there. Getting over a crush who’s taken is difficult, but possible. Just follow my simple tips and you’ll be on the road to getting over your crush!
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1. Accept It
Accept that it’s not going to happen. This is one of the most difficult aspects of getting over a crush, but it’s also the most important. Even if a relationship with your crush could happen somewhere down the road, right now it’s not. They’re taken. The more quickly you can accept it, the easier it will be to get over it.
2. Meet New People
Getting your mind off of the situation is essential to forgetting about your taken crush. A good way to get your mind off of the situation is to meet new people. Meet new potential love interests, or meet some new friends. This is good to do especially if your crush is also your friend. Staying away from your group of friends and finding some new friends, at least for the time being, is a perfect way to get over your taken crush.
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Expanding your social circle introduces you to diverse perspectives and experiences, which can be refreshing and help distract from fixated feelings. Try joining clubs, classes, or online communities that align with your interests. This not only shifts your focus but also increases the chances of connecting with someone who shares your passions. And remember, fostering new friendships can lead to unexpected opportunities for romance, naturally allowing you to move past your current emotional hurdle. Remember, your happiness and well-being should take center stage; meeting new people is a proactive step towards rediscovering your own joys and potentially finding someone who's truly available.
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3. Have New Experiences
Have some new experiences and make some new memories! It’s a good way to try and forget about the situation, but making new memories may help you to focus more on your new memories and less on the old memories with your taken crush!
4. Find Things That Bother You
It sounds so juvenile, but making a list of the things that bother you about your crush will help you get over it faster. Sometimes you have to focus on all of the things you hate about the person you like just to get over them. It doesn’t always have to be so hostile, but it might be better off that way at the beginning.
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This may feel a little petty, but it's surprisingly effective. Just grab a pen and paper, and start jotting down the things that turn you off. Maybe it's the way they chew loudly, or their obsession with that one annoying reality show. It could be their lack of punctuality or the way they handle their finances. Whatever it is, acknowledge your feelings without guilt. It's okay to realize that they're not as perfect as your infatuated mind once thought. This can be a therapeutic step towards emotional detachment and moving on with your life.
5. Distance Yourself
Depending on how close you are with your taken crush, it’s going to be more or less difficult to distance yourself. You can distance yourself mentally by choosing not to spend time with them. You can also distance yourself physically by getting a change in environment. If your circumstances allow for it, travel for a little while or even move away. Sometimes all it takes is a little bit of distance, whether mentally or physically, to get over your taken crush.
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If creating distance seems daunting, start with small steps. Begin by limiting your interactions, such as cutting down the time you spend checking their social media or diverting your attention when conversations revolve around them. Invest this newfound time in hobbies or activities that make you feel good about yourself. Surround yourself both socially and physically with supportive friends who understand your situation and encourage your journey to move forward. This reinforcement helps set boundaries that are crucial for your emotional wellbeing, making the process of moving on less overwhelming.
6. Be Sad
Allow yourself time to mourn. Don’t focus months of your life on it, but let yourself be sad for a few days. It’s okay to be sad, it’s the only way you’ll ever truly and healthily get over it!
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Embracing your emotions is essential, as suppressing them can lead to further heartache down the line. Give yourself permission to tear up over a sad movie or to wallow with your favorite comfort food. It's these little acts of self-kindness that can serve as a balm for your bruised feelings. And remember, expressing sadness doesn't make you weak; it makes you human. With each tear shed, you're washing away a piece of your attachment, carving a path forward to emotional freedom and readiness for new beginnings.
7. Don’t Relapse
Whatever you do, once you’re over your taken crush, don’t go back to them while they’re still taken. It’s not worth everything you just went through to get over them. It’s hard to get over a crush, especially when they’re taken, and it’s not worth it to relapse. It’s not worth the inevitable pain. You’ve mourned, you’ve distanced yourself, and you’ve accepted it, why would you go back?
It’s never easy to get over a crush who’s taken. Have you ever had a crush on someone in a relationship? How did you get over it? Share your stories in the comments!
Comments
Kasey: I need help myself.... This guy I was seeing for a few months, then he went to Spain.. We kept in contact, said would be back this summer but instead he went to French . My problem I haven't met anyone I like more than him.
Ana: He told not to*
Erika: I can kind of relate. There's this guy who I really liked for two years and he liked me back and we became good friends, not very close but 'pals'. All this time, he gave me signals but never actually said anything to me. That's what annoys me so much about him. He's immature, and why wouldn't he say anything? I'm not over him 100%, but I'm getting there. Btw, what does it mean if he unfriended me on Facebook?
Jillian: It's a bummer when the guy you seem so compatible with is taken. I'm familiar with that situation,but I know it wouldn't work out well even if we did become an item. Maybe you and the guy fit together,but someone else is a better fit for him. Anyway,it's also nice to think that someone even better will come along!
Jamie: So there is this guy I really like and he really likes me, he had a girlfriend up until a week ago. We have been talking for the past month and he never mentioned he had a girlfriend until I finally asked him. He said that things have been bad with them and they were "on their way out." The next day he texts me saying his life is no longer complicated and they broke up. I have to admit I was a little excited. Like I said its been a week since they broke up, but he's been kinda distant towards me. I've been just trying to play it cool, but I'm not sure what's going on right now. I don't expect to jump into a relationship with him.
Shariyah: .....
Jane: When I distanced myself from my crush.. It was so obvious because I could never escape him. It was worse wen we just so happened to get the same job out of town, where we had to work together. I felt more comfortable because his GF was miles away each weekend & he was all to myself ;)
Mawu: Me exactly. :(
Manj: I have had a crush on this man for 8 years. So stupid. Keep myself busy but still consumes my thoughts.
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