I’m sure a lot of us have dealt in the past with different fears that really endangered our relationships and sometimes, even managed to destroy them, and that’s why I believe that it’s extremely important to recognize those fears, and to learn different techniques for how to overcome fears. It’s quite common to have different worries during your relationship; every person does. The important thing that can really make a difference is to know how to overcome fears that might endanger your relationship, your happiness and your love life.
1. Lose Your Emotional Baggage!
One of the most efficient tips I could give you on how to overcome fears that might endanger your relationship is to advise you to lose all that emotional baggage that you’re carrying around with you. You should use what you’ve learned from your past relationships and you should do that, not to avoid new possible happy relationships, but to shape and adapt them to yours and your partner’s needs.
2. Your Relationship Will Not Damage Your Career
Nowadays, because our career plays such an important part in our lives, and because we invest so much time to accomplish our professional objectives, we might fear that a new relationship might endanger our work and in the long term, might even damage our career. If you’re feeling this way, you should remember that quality is much more important than quantity and it really doesn’t matter how much time you spend with your partner but what you do during that time. If you learn how to manage your time efficiently, your relationship will definitely not be endangering your career.
3. You Will Still Be You
A lot of people often worry that a relationship might make them forget who they really are and they could even lose their individuality. The thing to do in order to keep your identity and still be a good partner is to always seek a balance between the things you do for yourself and the things you do with or for your partner. Treat «me time» a little bit more seriously and you’ll see that you won’t have any reasons for worrying that you’ll forget about the person you once were by being in a relationship.
4. You Can Have a Happy and Healthy Sex Life
If you fear that a serious relationship may cause you in the long term to have a less exciting sex life, I must tell you that you couldn’t be more wrong. Of course, at the beginning of every relationship, your sex life is more spontaneous and hot, but once you get to know your partner better, although you might have sex less frequently, the quality of your sex life will improve significantly, especially regarding the emotional aspects involved. So, don’t worry, you can still have a happy and healthy sex life even though you’re in a long term and committed relationship.
5. Your Relationship is Unique
A lot of people, especially those who have a very independent nature, tend to be a bit scared that in time, their relationship will resemble the relationships of the people around them, and they fear that they’ll lose those things that make them so unique and amazing. This type of thinking couldn’t be more wrong because your relationship is created by the people involved and you are responsible for the way your relationship evolves. Remember that every relationship is different, just like the people in it.
6. You Will Still Have Shared Interests
A lot of people get to a point in their relationship when they fear that they have nothing in common and that all that excitement about their feelings for each other actually faded away. Of course, a lot of things can endanger your relationship but fears like this one are actually natural in every couple. In order to conquer and overcome this fear, you could propose doing something old that you could bring back or simply do something new that you’ll explore together.
7. You Will Still Be Loved for Who You Are
I’ve seen a lot of people (especially women), that fear when they’re in a committed relationship that they’ll get less attractive with age and they will lose the love of their partner. This type of thinking couldn’t be more wrong because you actually sabotage yourself. Try to convince yourself that your partner loves you for who you are and if you still want to assure yourself that your partner sees how beautiful you really are inside and out, start feeling good about yourself; get a new haircut, go to a gym or do something else you really enjoy!
Jane Greer, family therapist, radio host and author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness from Ruining Your Relationship said, "Fears can be useful in heading off future problems. Take them seriously, and make them work for you rather than against you." I couldn’t agree more! Do you have any other fears that might endanger your relationship? What do you do in order to overcome them? Please share your advice with me in the comments section!