All Women's Talk

17 Dirty Jokes You Should Share with Your Crush ...

By Holly

There's nothing wrong with talking about sex with your friends, your siblings, or your crush. In fact, it's healthy for you to become comfortable discussing your body. That's why you should tell your crush a few of these dirty jokes:

1 What’s the Difference between a G-spot and a Golf Ball?

facial expression,hair,face,white,black, "A guy will actually search for a golf ball." That's why so many women have trouble finishing in the bedroom.

2 Wanna Hear a Joke about My Vagina?

hair,face,person,blond,photography, "Never mind, you won't get it." You can use this line the next time an annoying man hits on you in the bar.

3 What do a Penis and a Rubik’s Cubes Have in Common?

eyewear,face,hair,nose,glasses, "The more you play with it, the harder it gets." You can't argue with that one.

4 What's 6 Inches Long, 2 Inches Wide, and Drives Women Wild?

hair,human hair color,blond,face,facial expression, "A 100 dollar bill." Why, what did you think the answer was?

5 Do You Know What 6.9 is?

hair,beauty,hairstyle,blond,brown hair, "A good thing screwed up by a period." If you're not sure why so many people laugh at that number, it's because it's a popular sex act.

6 What's a Man's Idea of Foreplay?

screenshot,sitting, "A half hour of begging." He won't mind demeaning himself if it means he'll end up having sex.

7 Why do Men like Masturbation?

blond,supermodel,model,Wink, "It's sex with someone they love." They're their own best friend.

8 Sex is like Air

person,musician,stage,singing,guitarist, "It's not important unless you aren't getting any." It's not something you think about unless you have to.

9 Why do Men Get Their Great Ideas in Bed?

hair,human hair color,human action,person,clothing, "Because they're plugged into a genius!" We're the smart ones, after all.

10 What's the Difference between Being Hungry and Horny?

hair,face,person,hairstyle,beauty, "Where you put the cucumber." You can either put it in your mouth or your... Well, you get the idea.

11 What Did the Banana Say to the Vibrator?

hair,black and white,monochrome photography,monochrome,fictional character, "Why are YOU shaking? She's going to eat me!" That's a whole lot worse than the alternative.

12 Why Doesn’t Santa Have Any Kids?

hair,person,mouth,blond,interaction, "He only comes once per year." That significantly lowers his chances of producing offspring.

13 If You Don't Believe in Oral Sex...

beauty,singing,singer,nightclub, "You should keep your mouth shut." It only makes sense.

14 Did You Get Those Yoga Pants on Sale?

human hair color,hair,face,red,blond, "Because at my house they're 100% off." This is more of a pick-up line than a dirty joke, but you can still use it on your crush.

15 Having Sex in an Elevator is Wrong on so Many Levels

facial expression,black,hair,face,white, This is a one liner that's funnier than some of the longest jokes you've ever heard.

16 What do Women and Police Cars Have in Common?

performance art,entertainment,stage,singing,singer, "They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming." Hey, we need to give out the information somehow.

17 Masturbation is like Procrastination

black and white,human positions,photography,beauty,monochrome photography, "It's all good and fun until you realize you are only screwing yourself."

Now you have a few jokes that you can tell your crush to amp up the sexual tension. What's the best dirty joke that you've ever heard?

sources:
jokes4us.com
thoughtcatalog.com
onelinefun.com

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