All Women's Talk

How to Get over Your Ex ...

By Holly

It doesn't matter how long you two were together for, because it's always hard to get over an ex. Even if you know the breakup was for the best, there will be things you'll miss about them. That's why even the strongest, most independent women will benefit from these different ways to get over an ex:

1 Write Yourself a Note

If you're a fan of How I Met Your Mother, you'll probably remember the technique the gang uses to get over women. They take a piece of paper and write out a note to themselves about their ex--and you should do the same. Write down all of the reasons why your relationship failed. It's okay to get a bit nasty, because you want to make sure you jot down all of the bad things about your ex. That way, whenever you have the urge to text them to get back together, you can reread your own words to see why that's such a bad idea.

2 Aim to Find Closure

When it comes to break ups, there's a lot of talk about closure. The best way to get it is by asking your ex why they broke up with you. "It's not you, it's me" is not a valid reason. Once they spit out the truth to you, you might realize that they're right and you two don't work as a couple. At the very least, it'll give you closure, because you won't have to spend your life wondering what you've done wrong.

3 Set Aside Separation Time

Remaining friends with an ex is tricky, but it can be done. However, it's important for you two to cut communication for a few weeks. "Out of sight, out of mind" is actually an amazing technique. Once you stop crying every time someone says their name, you can start texting again, and then you can start hanging out again.

4 Put Away Your Memories

You don't have to delete all of their photographs from your phone, just like you don't have to burn all of the gifts they gave you. However, you don't want reminders of them in your line of sight. You should transfer their pictures to your computer and put them in a file you won't stumble across often, and you should put their gifts in a box in the back of your closet. That way, you'll still have keepsakes, but they won't be around to constantly remind you of your ex.

5 Create Productive Distractions

There are plenty of productive ways to distract yourself from thinking about an ex. You can focus on your career. You can learn how to paint or play guitar. You can strengthen your relationships with your friends and family. Anything positive you can think of will work wonders.

6 Avoid Stalking Him

There's no reason to stalk your ex on Facebook and constantly check his Instagram updates. You're not going to benefit from seeing what he's up to without you. Besides, people only post positive things online, so you'll only see how happy he looks without you. You'll never see his tears.

7 Find Someone New

You shouldn't sleep with the first person you see after getting dumped. However, it's important to avoid closing yourself off after a break up. You never know when the right guy will arrive, so don't turn someone down, because you're still upset over your ex. It can do you some good to go out on dates. It doesn't have to be anything serious. It's just a bit of fun.

It takes time to develop a relationship with someone, and it can take even more time to get over that special someone. However, it'll happen eventually, so don't give up hope. What have you done to get over your ex?

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