Our culture has hammered it into our psyches that the guy is generally the one who has to take the first step in a relationship. He is expected to be the first to pursue, the first to connect, the first to ask you out on a date, get you a gift, pay on the table and pop the question. All this can get quite frustrating for an independent woman, who is actually interested in someone. You may be worried about how to send the right signals. The trick is to be subtle, yet decisive. The man should know that you want to be approached, but he shouldn’t think that you are desperate. It is not so difficult, though, once you know what to do. Here are 7 ways to show subtly that you are available.
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1. A Smile
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Your face contains the best clues about your level of interest in someone, and a smile is one of the most powerful and endearing statements of interest. When you smile at someone warmly, it is an invitation to develop a connection. There are no other connotations to it, and it cannot be misinterpreted. However, the key is to smile and be subtle, rather than overdoing the gesture, which can suggest desperation.
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Your smile should be genuine; it goes without saying. A forced smile is easily recognized and can throw off the sincerity of your approach. When your smile reaches your eyes, it's an unequivocal sign of friendliness and openness. It unconsciously invites the other person to engage in conversation and find common ground. Remember, a subtle yet natural smile suggests a content and approachable individual, making you irresistibly attractive to those around you.
Great question! Pay attention to how you present yourself: smile often, make eye contact, and maybe even flirt a little. Just don’t come on too strong—keep it light and fun.
It’s all about balance. Make sure you have your own life and interests, and don’t drop everything for someone else. Show that you value your time and they should too!
If you’re always the one initiating plans, or you cancel your plans to accommodate someone else, you might be too available. Take a step back and let others come to you sometimes.
Not at all! As long as you’re enjoying yourself and not putting pressure on finding a relationship, it can actually make you seem more approachable and fun to be around.
Just be yourself! Show that you’re open to meeting new people, but also that you’re happy and confident on your own. Desperation usually comes from focusing too much on being with someone instead of enjoying life.
2. Eye Contact
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The key to budding love or interest is not just on your lips, but equally in your eyes. Most women are not aware of just how powerful their eyes can be. To give you an idea, some cultures advise men that a woman’s eyes are a tool of hypnosis! However, like any powerful tool, you have to use your eyes smartly and carefully. When you look towards the guy you are interested in, actually look at him rather than passing your glance over, and let your eyes linger a bit. Not more than a few seconds, though. If eye contact is held for too long, it can be intimidating for the other person. The idea is to exercise restraint and be opportunistic. Someone said that as long as you have a smile and your eyes, you have little reason to worry. That’s absolutely correct. Your facial signals are amongst the best ways to show subtly that you are available.
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To master the art of eye-contact charm, try the glance-and-look-away technique. It's a flirty classic and it speaks volumes. A quick look, paired with a shy smile or a playful wink, can boost the intrigue and communicate your interest without saying a word. Remember, it should feel as natural as possible, blending in with the flow of your conversation. You want to pull him into a tantalizing dance of glances that leaves him yearning for more—but with grace and subtlety. This silent exchange can build tension and anticipation, making your presence irresistible.
Great question! Pay attention to how you present yourself: smile often, make eye contact, and maybe even flirt a little. Just don’t come on too strong—keep it light and fun.
It’s all about balance. Make sure you have your own life and interests, and don’t drop everything for someone else. Show that you value your time and they should too!
If you’re always the one initiating plans, or you cancel your plans to accommodate someone else, you might be too available. Take a step back and let others come to you sometimes.
Not at all! As long as you’re enjoying yourself and not putting pressure on finding a relationship, it can actually make you seem more approachable and fun to be around.
Just be yourself! Show that you’re open to meeting new people, but also that you’re happy and confident on your own. Desperation usually comes from focusing too much on being with someone instead of enjoying life.
3. Read His Signals
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Image source: data.whicdn.com
You may know your tools, but you need to be observant too. Is he responding to your eye contact? Is he smiling back at you? If you perceive interest, you already have a connection. However, it is important not to be too jumpy or over-enthusiastic. Take it slowly. Linger at the level of eye contact for a while, and see if he takes the next step. The idea is to drift closer rather than plunge in.
Great question! Pay attention to how you present yourself: smile often, make eye contact, and maybe even flirt a little. Just don’t come on too strong—keep it light and fun.
It’s all about balance. Make sure you have your own life and interests, and don’t drop everything for someone else. Show that you value your time and they should too!
If you’re always the one initiating plans, or you cancel your plans to accommodate someone else, you might be too available. Take a step back and let others come to you sometimes.
Not at all! As long as you’re enjoying yourself and not putting pressure on finding a relationship, it can actually make you seem more approachable and fun to be around.
Just be yourself! Show that you’re open to meeting new people, but also that you’re happy and confident on your own. Desperation usually comes from focusing too much on being with someone instead of enjoying life.
4. If He Doesn’t Respond…
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Image source: data.whicdn.com
Don’t be disheartened. It may mean that he is confused or uncertain. There may be a million things going on in his mind, and he may take time to warm up to your interest. If he is a colleague, a common friend or a classmate, you know that you will meet him again, and you can show your subtle signs of interest every now and then, over a period of several days. The key is neither to get disheartened nor impatient. Don’t make your attempts too obvious, and wait.
***
Don’t be disheartened. It may mean that he is confused or uncertain. There may be a million things going on in his mind, and he may take time to warm up to your interest. If he is a colleague, a common friend or a classmate, you know that you will meet him again, and you can show your subtle signs of interest every now and then, over a period of several days. The key is neither to get disheartened nor impatient. Don’t make your attempts too obvious, and wait.
Great question! Pay attention to how you present yourself: smile often, make eye contact, and maybe even flirt a little. Just don’t come on too strong—keep it light and fun.
It’s all about balance. Make sure you have your own life and interests, and don’t drop everything for someone else. Show that you value your time and they should too!
If you’re always the one initiating plans, or you cancel your plans to accommodate someone else, you might be too available. Take a step back and let others come to you sometimes.
Not at all! As long as you’re enjoying yourself and not putting pressure on finding a relationship, it can actually make you seem more approachable and fun to be around.
Just be yourself! Show that you’re open to meeting new people, but also that you’re happy and confident on your own. Desperation usually comes from focusing too much on being with someone instead of enjoying life.
If you're looking to engage your partner in intriguing conversations, why not try some hypothetical questions for couples? These fun queries will not only keep the conversation lively but also stimulate deep thoughts and potentially reveal insights about each other's personality and thought processes.
5. If You Get Talking…
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You need to preserve your equilibrium. Don’t make obvious attempts to impress him or admire him. Try to keep the conversation as normal as possible, and let it take its own course. The game is still in your eyes. While you are talking, maintain eye contact for a fraction longer than you would with someone else. Also, if the conversation is dying down or he wants to move ahead, don’t make special attempts to hold him back. That conveys desperation. Remember, the idea is to find ways to show subtly that you are available, not desperately.
Great question! Pay attention to how you present yourself: smile often, make eye contact, and maybe even flirt a little. Just don’t come on too strong—keep it light and fun.
It’s all about balance. Make sure you have your own life and interests, and don’t drop everything for someone else. Show that you value your time and they should too!
If you’re always the one initiating plans, or you cancel your plans to accommodate someone else, you might be too available. Take a step back and let others come to you sometimes.
Not at all! As long as you’re enjoying yourself and not putting pressure on finding a relationship, it can actually make you seem more approachable and fun to be around.
Just be yourself! Show that you’re open to meeting new people, but also that you’re happy and confident on your own. Desperation usually comes from focusing too much on being with someone instead of enjoying life.
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6. Confiding in Mutual Friends
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You have to be careful. If you are interested in a guy, you must confide only in a friend who you know will respect your privacy. The last thing you want is your friend to announce excitedly to the group, ‘you know what, Alice has a thing for Josh!’ It can be very embarrassing for both you and "Josh", and the budding connection can wilt right there.
Great question! Pay attention to how you present yourself: smile often, make eye contact, and maybe even flirt a little. Just don’t come on too strong—keep it light and fun.
It’s all about balance. Make sure you have your own life and interests, and don’t drop everything for someone else. Show that you value your time and they should too!
If you’re always the one initiating plans, or you cancel your plans to accommodate someone else, you might be too available. Take a step back and let others come to you sometimes.
Not at all! As long as you’re enjoying yourself and not putting pressure on finding a relationship, it can actually make you seem more approachable and fun to be around.
Just be yourself! Show that you’re open to meeting new people, but also that you’re happy and confident on your own. Desperation usually comes from focusing too much on being with someone instead of enjoying life.
7. Don’t Stalk Him
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That’s a big no, and you need to be careful as you may be doing it subconsciously. Lingering a little longer in the cafeteria because he is sitting there, hanging around the library when you know he is about to come, staying back for an extra class just for him are all indicators of a pursuit. It is natural for us to be excited about being somewhere where our crush is too, but you need to control that to some extent. If he sees you looking at him, every time he looks up, wherever he may be, your attempt will be anything but subtle.
If you can keep in mind these tips, you will do just fine. However, remember that no matter how well you execute these ways to show subtly that you are available, the other person may just not be interested. Again, there could be numerous reasons for this, and they may have nothing to do with you. So, try not to let your self esteem take a hit. You may find someone equally engaging waiting for you round the corner! Any subtle tips you might want to add?
Top image source: hookingupsmart.com
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Comments
neverhadagf2: Does this advice apply to men too?
neverhadagf2: My stoopid mom made me think all men except 1% are je rks and I was st vupid enough to beleive I was the only good man and women would value me as a rare and preciouos gem instead of woerthlwesstras h. THe advice I get says that turned me into a sis sy that women hate coz tha masculine attracts the femine even tho women claim to H8 masculinity
Anonymous: well theres this guy i like, but he dont even know me but i like him and i wanthim to know i do so he could ask me out..help plis!
neverhadagf2: #6 JUST TELL ME I HAVE NO FRIENDS. Is women following bad advice like this the rrason they are snobby and I don't think it's possible for a woman to think I'm not ugly feces
neverhadagf2: #1 Good luck w/ that ladies, I cannot look a woman in the eye w/o feeling unworthy of her perfectness enter my unworthy eyes unless I know she thinks I'm not ugly and I knnow she's not outta my league
neverhadagf2: I just said what women think of me and it says "That's sound too rough." and "Please watch your language .." if women are such sissues offended so easily, then they should take a good look in the mirror. Just goes to show how rough women are on men!!!!!!!!!
neverhadagf2: ALL WOMEN MY AGE (except one or two) ARE PUT ON THIS EARTH FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE TO MAKE ME CONFUSED AND MISERABLE. How else can I explain why they are snobby to me?
neverhadagf2: #1 One time I thuoght a girl was smiling at me, I asked her out for cofee and she just make excuses. Should have known better than to think she would have gone for me and actually thought I was worthy of the light off her perfect hair and body and face enter my unwirthy eyes.
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