Niamh Id tell him if I was you. I just came out of a relationship like this in the start of the year and my ex was 100% like the article says. We brought a house and had been together for almost 2.5 years when he wanted to break up. Now I'm dating a wonderful guy who is completely respectful to me and is showing me what a true gentleman is. Looking back at how my ex treated me I realise he honestly didn't love me

Ok Hun

Real strength don't come from the fact you didn't let something negative happen to you. Real strength come from the negative happening to you but finding the strength to get out of it! Just my opinion.

My boyfriend and I broke up on 9th of May because both of us are Hindus but he belongs to such a community where love marriages are considered to be a crime. I never forced him for marriage nor for any other thing but wanted to make things clear between us. I tried talking to him twice regarding solving this matter because I just can't afford to lose him just like that but the very first time I tried to solve it, we broke up and the very next time when I tried talking to him, he got outraged on me and even quoted that now I irritate him. There are a lot of misunderstanding between us and he really thinks that I'm forcing him to get married to me, it's nothing like that. Since the very beginning he do only the things he wishes to do. I never went against his will. I told my parents about him because I never hide anything from them and he got scared after knowing this and started to maintain distance with me because he really is scared of his family and he thinks that if his family will come to know that he is in a relationship or even committing a love marriage, they will make him to stay at home and the very next month will arrange a girl for him to marry. I love him so much that I even went into depression for a while, even forgot my really identity, like the way I used to behave all the cute cuddly nature is gone. I know that a love should be unconditional but I used to feel alive when I was with him. Now I just work hard to distract my mind. 24/7 I'm busy doing something because I know that if I'll sit alone for a while, his memories will haunt me. Whenever I remember something, I smile like a stupid instead of crying because they were so beautiful I don't wish to forget them. There was a time in the middle of March, I felt that he's getting away from me, I even wrote a novel on our relationship because I never got to tell him what I actually think and how much I love him. Our mutual college friends are even telling me that his family is planning a marriage in the mid of December and I really can't lose him just like that before it gets too late I wish to get him back by then. Sometimes I feel that whatever he's doing is on purpose. His ignorance. His rude attitude. He himself is confused and scared because he wishes to be with me but can't because of his family. I'm sick and tired of listening to "You will find a better person in future." "Forget him, he wasn't worth it." "There are plenty of fishes in the ocean." Feelings never show up just like that. I really loved him. When he was with me, my smile seemed to be a permanent feature of my face but now since he's gone, I'm actually forced to smile. Watching him everyday in college actually makes my day but still I can't face him. I can't just let him go, whatever we had, whatever thing he said to me, they can't go away just like that. I left everything on god; praying everyday to get him back. Maybe it will help because he can't be so unfair to bring him in my life and then take him away just like that. Hope god will make everything go alright.

At the start of my relationship my boyfriend used to disrespect me. When we'd fight over little things he'd get very nasty and put me down. If I ever confided in him about something it would be used against me in a fight. My opinions don't really matter to him either he thinks he's more intelligent than me and it can be hard when making descions together like where to move apartment. I used to have very low self esteem and never really thought he was disrespecting me and I was in love with him too so I let a lot of this behaviour slide but I think over time I've started to resent him a little. I know that I may have made him sound like a bad boyfriend but he has been very good to me and we have shared many good times together and he has a lot of good traits too. But lately I have been thinking of breaking up with him. I have said how I feel to him about disrespecting me and he said he'll change but I think it's too late for that now. I think the love I had for him has faded. I'm really scared to end my relationship though. I can't help but feel I'll be making a huge mistake.

Been there,done that and cried my eyes out for a while then decided to laugh. Life is too short to pine after the ones who refuse to respect you. Being with no man is better than being with the wrong one ! They are the losers having not recognised how lovely you ladies are . What would you tell your best friend if she were in your situation? Bet you would tell her to start putting herself first for a change and not waste her life on theses problem kids !

Thanks Akki. I have said this to him before, we've nearly broken up a few times over it. He says he'll change and he has stopped name calling me but there are still ways he disrespects me like not listening to my needs or disregarding my opinion. It's just hard because these are not everyday occurrences and he is my best friend. I just feel like I don't want to live my whole life never feeling the respect I deserve. Thank you also Beki4993 it's very reassuring to hear other girls have gone through the same thing. I'm glad things worked out well for you and you're with someone who loves and respects you :)

Thanks Husna. I really appreciate your advice but at some point I feel that I should leave everything on god. I'm sick and tired of these myriad "after break up" quotes. I left everything on god. He ain't a rock, maybe one day he will look back at me. There isn't a bad thing in keeping my hopes high?

The thing is these types of characters are slippery little b@st@rds and ever one of those points are true and then some .... But how they get away with it is that they don't show all of those all the time - they turn them down and off according to what they want from you at any given time. They can be nice and charming even loving characters but I'd suggest when they are being so likeable it's only a mask that shortly is bound to slip and reveal that very horrible nature. Hard work for sure. If you challenge this type than can and will be physically violent towards you. The straight up truth😕

Bravo!!!!!