13 Ways to Tell if a Guy is Sending Mixed Signals ...

13 Ways to Tell if a Guy is Sending Mixed Signals ...
By Heather • Aug 24, 2023 MD

Guys are the masters at sending mixed signals, aren't they? They say that women are bad, but when a guy is sending mixed signals it can last so much longer! So ladies, I've got the break down of all of the different ways you can tell if a guy is sending mixed signals to you!

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1. Mood Swings

Mood swings are absolutely one of the top ways you can tell if a guy is sending mixed signals. He is happy one second and then sad or depressed another. It could be something in his personality that makes him go through his mood swings, but truthfully, he is probably covering up the fact that he is shy and doesn't know how to act around you.

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2. Ignores You in Public

If your guy is constantly ignoring you in public, it could be one of the signs he is sending you mixed signals. How do you get around it? Well, talk to him! Express how you feel about the fact that, when you are in private, he is fine, but when you are in public, he ignores you.

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3. Flirts with You in Private

One of the signs he is sending mixed signals is if he only flirts with you in private. When you are with a guy, you want him to flirt with you all over the place, not just in private. This is another conversation you might have to have with your man!

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4. He’s Coy

When a guy is coy, it could be one of the signs he's sending mixed signals, but truthfully, he could just be shy. When a guy is coy, it could also be perceived as he is trying to play hard to get. Just be assertive and really put yourself out there. Who knows? He'll probably crack his coyness!

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Understanding a coy guy can be like trying to solve a puzzle with missing pieces. Is he interested or simply bashful? Sometimes the best approach is to take the lead, showing him that he's in a safe space to open up. Be a little flirty, send a clear signal that you're into him, and pay attention to his response. If he's into you, your confidence might just be the key to unlocking his affections. Remember, even the most reserved hearts have a way of speaking their truth when given the right encouragement.

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If you're looking to engage your partner in intriguing conversations, why not try some hypothetical questions for couples? These fun queries will not only keep the conversation lively but also stimulate deep thoughts and potentially reveal insights about each other's personality and thought processes.

5. He’s Testing You

Just like girls, guys test us too. While you might think he is sending mixed signals, he could just be testing your responses and flirting. Trust me ladies, if he is testing you, test him right back!

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6. He Plays Hard to Get

Remember the coy piece? It's probably because he is playing hard to get! If the guy that you are into is playing hard to get, play it up and play it right back. It'll make you seem more attractive and put him in his place!

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7. Mixed Signals Are a Defense Mechanism

Did you know that if he is sending mixed signals, it could be a defense mechanism for him not wanting to get hurt? Just like we have defense mechanisms that are set off by certain things, when a guy is sending mixed signals, it could mean that he is super shy and wants to feel you out first!

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Just like we have defense mechanisms that are set off by certain things, when a guy is sending mixed signals, it could mean that he is super shy and wants to feel you out first! He might be unsure about how you feel and doesn’t want to risk getting hurt by putting himself out there too soon. By giving mixed signals, he can gauge your reaction and protect his emotions. This can lead to him acting distant one moment and affectionate the next, creating a confusing but understandable pattern as he navigates his feelings and fears of vulnerability.

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8. He Talks about You to His Friends

One of the biggest mixed signals that I find with a guy is when he constantly talks to his friends about you, but doesn't talk to you! What do you do? Well ladies, upping your flirting a bit and making him come to you is a great way to quash him from sending mixed signals and let him know that you like him!

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9. He Tries to Control the Situation

If the guy tries to control everything you do and says, "I'll let you know" or "I'll call you," it's probably because he is sending mixed signals. He is not sure what he wants yet so he wants to be the one who tells you when the next date will be and if he has time for you. However, you should stand up for yourself and tell him you don't have time to just hang around waiting for him.

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10. Days Go by without Talking

Things are going great, it's your third date and you're pretty sure that by the fourth date, you'll be official. But then he goes days without calling you or answering your text messages, and you don't know why. Well that's because he is afraid to take the next step with you and make a commitment. This is when you have to decide if you want to stick around and wait for him to be done sending these mixed signals or you would rather leave him a message that you're done!

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11. Only Wants to Hang out Together with Friends

Every time you text him to get together he mentions bringing his buddy with him, even when you thought it was a movie date. If his friends always seem to be around when you're together, this may be a sign he is sending you mixed signals and isn't sure what he wants. If you've had enough, just ask him about it!

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12. You Haven't Kissed Yet

You've been on a few dates and he still hasn't kissed you yet. This could either be a mixed signal he is sending out because he isn't sure what he wants, or he isn't sure whether you're ready and wants you to kiss him first.

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13. He Starts Flirting with Someone else

You thought things were going great and you thought your dating relationship would go to the next step. However, you noticed that he has started to flirt with one of your friends and now you're just confused. Is he trying to make you jealous or is he moving on?

It's hard when a guy is sending mixed signals, but that doesn't mean you should stop trying to hook him! Do you know of any guys sending mixed signals right now? What do you do?

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Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

  • Emma

    2013-09-21T21:02:21.000Z

    So theres this guy who ive liked for a long time and i think he like's me, but im not sure. We talk a lot and joke around. I want to see if he's interested in me, but i'm to scared to ask. Help?!
  • Ana

    2014-11-02T03:59:21.086Z

    Add commenthello
  • Anonymous

    2012-10-07T21:31:57.000Z

    When a guy and his friends are playing games with you what does it mean you like mind games also like one minute hot the next cold.
  • anonymous

    2013-11-04T01:02:12.000Z

    Hi, heather I read the article and the guy that I'm interested in (we hung out for the first time this past weekend) definitely flirted with me in private earlier this week through text and he didn't ignore me but he only talked to me when it was necessary this weekend... I didn't over-do-it but we texted a lot during the week before we met up and I think I might've made him lose interest because when we did talk it was usually the same mundane questions like "how was work?" "Did you have a good day?"but the first two days we talked he seemed really interested asking me if I'd wanna go to dinner with him and calling me "dear"..originally he was supposed to come visit with me for a while on Friday before he went to his camp but I came down there instead and spent the whole weekend (if it's getting confusing: I'm gonna fill you in & tell you he's a friend of family who I hadn't seen since I was about 9 or 10 and now we're 19, he's 20, this all started with him randomly messaged me on Facebook a week ago) anyways do you think he's upset that I kinda invaded his guy-time eventhough his friends seemed to like me? Also, he made a comment to his friends while I was present "I'm enjoying being single; saving my money and spending it on myself" and later the next day I saw him post a Facebook status directed at some other girl I'm guessing because he in a non-cocky or mean way stated why she had the wrong impression of him and how he's such a great person blah blah blah. Also we side-hugged twice this weekend and I think he might've smiled at me a few times? I guess what I'm saying is, is where do you think I stand with him? I'm going down to his camp next weekend so if you suggest confronting him about it, I'll have the oppurtunity... Sorry this was so long, but I'm just SO CONFUSED.
  • Leanna

    2017-10-22T04:57:26.756Z

    He sees me as a sister and I don’t understand that!?? Like I was told it wouldn’t hurt anything if we did start dating and such. I’m trying my hardest to get him to open up to me. He’ll read my messages but won’t reply. Makes me feel like I’m irritating him. He told me that he’s been cheated on and lied to a lot and all I want is a chance with him to show him that not all women are the same. Yes, he knows that. My question is, do you all think he’s playing hard to get with me!?!
  • Anonymous

    2012-12-21T23:56:02.000Z

    Hey my crush has done all these above after i told him how i feel about him so it is confusing if it means he likes me back but he may be shy or hiding it and the one about telling his friends like he has told his friends that i told him i like him and now they all like tease me in a joking way and all of them ignore me
  • Baxan

    2013-09-20T10:35:55.000Z

    Hello :) i have been talking to this guy for about 6 months he has told me that he has feelings for me and i like him and we got along very well.. Lately he is hot and cold and i try to talk to him about it he said he hasnt changed! What do i do :(
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