Does your boyfriend’s ex refuse to leave him alone? Maybe she calls him, stalks him on social media or is just generally around too much for your comfort. So what’s a girl to do? It turns out there’s a lot you can do in this situation!
You don’t want to panic when there’s an ex that won’t leave your boyfriend alone. You need to be calm and approach the situation in a reasonable manner. The first thing you want to do is evaluate the circumstances. Are there good reasons for your boyfriend’s ex to contact him? If they share a child together, then there’s always going to be some contact between them. Do they have some old business they need to discuss such as a shared credit card or something similar?
This one is important. Observe your man when his ex contacts him. How does he act? This can tell you if you have anything to worry about or not. If he doesn’t like to talk to her and acts aggravated or frustrated when she contacts him then relax; he doesn’t like it any better than you do. However, if he lights up when she calls or is flirty toward her then you have a problem.
This’s a strategy to try. Maybe your boyfriend’s in the shower or talking to a friend and can’t get to his phone. That’s a good time to answer for him. Sometimes just letting an ex know that you’re in the picture can help. It’s a reminder that he’s moved on.
Sometimes the best thing to do is give it time, especially if it’s not happening constantly. His ex may get the hint and stop contacting your boyfriend on her own. She may just need to see that he’s with you now and you’re not going anywhere. Patience can pay off in this situation. That all depends on how extreme her actions are.
If his ex is truly an issue then something needs to be done. The best way to handle this is for you to not handle it at all. She’s not going to listen to you and in fact, may up her attempts to connect with your boyfriend to spite you. The best solution is for your boyfriend to put a stop to it. If he doesn’t want to end his contact with her then that’s a red flag.
Intuition or gut feelings are seldom wrong. What’s your intuition telling you? Is the issue mainly on the part of his ex? Or is it possible he’s not ready to sever his ties with her? These’re difficult questions to ask yourself but it’s important to be real here. You deserve your own honesty.
If the situation isn’t one where he needs to have contact with her then you may decide it’s best to exit the situation. That’s a decision only you can make. You deserve someone who only has eyes for you. You also deserve someone who will follow appropriate boundaries when it comes to your relationship. Don’t settle for anything less.
It’s difficult to deal when your boyfriend’s ex won’t leave him alone. Are you in this situation? You’re welcome to share.
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